Quest For Happiness
Goals, success, health, relationships and finances are probably the top five issues that many coaches are asked to deal with.
Every client presents with a unique set of challenges, circumstances and background and I believe that however long their list of situations, there is a common denominator to them all and it can be summarised in just two words, happiness and contentment.
Each quest for happiness and contentment will be different. In some instances it will mean that various behaviours, beliefs and thought patterns need careful and progressive change and the coach is the effective catalyst that can facilitate this.
There is another more subtle aspect of coaching that can be easily overlooked. This involves clients who appear to have it all, who enjoy good health, great relationships and an enviable lifestyle and who still lack happiness and contentment.
Again, there is a broad spectrum of degrees. At one end this will be a vague but persistent sensation of, ‘is that it?’ and boredom has already gained a foothold. At the other end there may be a fear of losing all that has been achieved. Within this range, the typical coaching models and techniques may be less effective than in the more action centred tools needed to address the top five or ten most common issues.
Here we need a far more sensitive and gentle approach which involves steering the client towards a new way of thinking. The standard paradigm, which works in most coaching, is that our thoughts determine our actions. In the altogether more aware world of clients who have achieved their success but still lack happiness, a great coach will show how this standard can be reversed so that actions can be defined to change thoughts.
I liken this to a dentist. One patient may need the application of some tools that would not look out of place in a DIY enthusiast’s tool box and their use; with sheer strength to remove a reluctant molar that needs extraction. The next may require precise use of fine instruments that would happily live in a watchmaker’s kit to remove pressure on a damaged nerve.
I’m sorry if this mention of dentistry has hit a sensitive nerve in your psyche! My point is that the Achievement Specialists approach to coaching has never been [and never will be] that ‘one size fits all’. The coaches that I train are made well aware of all the degrees and subtleties of coaching, they have the ‘tools’ appropriate for each and, most importantly, the awareness of when to use these for the benefits of their clients.
Enjoy your own quest for happiness and contentment and, if you have already reached these twin peaks, just take time out to truly appreciate them and congratulate yourself as you give thanks.
Extract taken from Special Achievement Newsletter June 2007 www.achievementspecialists.co.uk/freebie/newsletter